Its over

It was too good to be true. Ive been crying constantly for about 24hrs now. At first when I started bleeding I was thinking that I still had hope, that it could be okay. My sister told me she bled a lot with her son in the very beggining of her pregnancy. But when last night came, and the bleeding got really bad I knew there was no way a healthy pregnancy could come out of this. I dont know how to deal with this, I am so sad, upset, hurt, angry and every other emotion. I dont want to go to work, or even get out of bed. How do I go on? They say to give my body "rest" and dont try again for at LEAST a month. How am I supposed to wait again for something I have wanted so long? And something I waited for Jason to be ready to do for a year? And even if I were to get pregnant again, I know I will be a nervous wreck waiting out the first few weeks, actually probably the whole first trimester. I just want to be pregnant now. Not in 2 more months. The most sad thing is (and sitting here about to type it thinking of it, is making me cry) last night Jason was kissing my belly and saying "stay with us baby bean" "we love you" and then slept with his hand on my belly all night. This is the worst feeling I have ever felt in my entire life.